Thursday, February 26, 2009

Taylor is Not So Swift

Ok, I've had just about enough. I'm not saying that I was the greatest student of all time or anything, but I know some stuff. I know that the genus and species of a seahorse is hippocampus erectus. I know that Magna Carta was issued in 1215. I know the basics of the Pythagorean theorem. I know why Hestor Prynne had to sport the scarlet letter and perhaps most importantly to this post: I know that Romeo and Juliet is not, repeat not, a love story. It is a tragedy!

It's not: "For never was there a story of more happiness then that of Juliet and her Romeo" because not only does that not rhyme, but it's also not what happened. Sure, love is one of the unifying themes in the story, but its not used to celebrate love. Rather, the love that they have for each other is a juxtaposition of the hate their families have for one another. The ultimate tragedy isn't just that they both kill themselves, but that they couldn't be together in the first place.

That brings us to Ms. Swift and her song "Love Story." Some may say: "come on Greazy, its just a cute little song about love, don't be a nitpicker." Well, my response is that there are some nits that must be picked. You can't just go around co-opting famous stories and changing the ending. If you want to do a reimagining of a story, like the Wiz, then that's cool. But there is no way you should ever be allowed to fuck with an ending like Taylor has done.

In her song (find the lyrics here if you can't stand to listen to the above link) Taylor goes through the first three quarters of the song in the general spirit of Shakespeare's work, but then does a 180. In the songs last stanza she has the star cross'd lovers meet in a field where Romeo surprises Jules by telling her that he's sorted out all the problems with her dad and that he had a ring for her. Ugh!

Really Taylor Swift? Really? If you wanted to rip off an old story to write a love song, why not just rip off an actual love story? Plus, not only have you shat on Will S, but apparently, unlike me, you don't know what Hester Prynne did to get that letter. Otherwise you wouldn't have used the line "You were Romeo I was a scarlet letter and my daddy said stay away from Juliet." That is, unless you are saying the female in your story not only loves Romeo, but that she was an outcast in her community because she fucked a married man and had his bastard. If that's what you were going for, then I retract this part of the rant, but I somehow doubt it.

Maybe Taylor Swift would have a better grasp of literature if she had payed more attention to High School and less attention to becoming famous and dating a Jonas brother. Obama said it the other night: failing to get the basic high school education is "not just quitting on yourself, it's quitting on your country." For shame Taylor Swift. I can't believe you let the country down like that.

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