Sunday, November 02, 2008

Sign of the Apocalypse?

The photo you see here is a Golden Orb Weaver spider eating a Chestnut-breasted Mannikin... which is a type of bird. That's right, this is a spider, eating a bird. This kind of reminds me of the scene from Ghost Busters where the team is trying to describe to the Mayor what is in the offing around them:

Peter: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions.
Mayor: What do you mean biblical?
Ray: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath of God type stuff.
Peter: Exactly
Ray: Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
Egon: Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes...
Winston: The dead rising from the grave!
Peter: Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!

I'm not sure, but, I think the next line would have been: "spiders eating birds". Its just not a natural progression of things, birds are supposed to eat spiders. I like my steak medium/well, my strippers with natural tits and my Chordates above my arthropods on the food chain. Is that too fucking much to ask? It's hard to think about living in a world where spiders can eat birds, but not too hard to figure out where this paradoxical story comes from... that's right, Australia.

Just west of Cairns Queensland, where Inky and I vacationed a few years ago, an old man with a camera happened upon the sight of this giant spider trapping, paralyzing and gnawing on this bird. Against all odds Les Martin didn't pass out from fear. Nor did he run away, or sit rocking in a corner while crying, as many of us might have. Instead he calmly went about snapping photos of the ungodly act, which have traveled around the world to herald the arrival of the apocalypse.

All I could think about when Inky showed me the link to this story in the Geelong Newspaper, was: thank god that wasn't us. Inky relies on me to to the lion share of the bug killing around our place, and honestly don't know what I would do if confronted with a Golden Orb-weaver. This isn't the type of bug you can get rid of with a few paper towels. You'd have to believe that a sword and shield would be more called for, and perhaps six or seven pairs of shoes. But, those Aussies are tougher then we are, as I've said before, and I wouldn't be surprised if this wasn't some kids pet by the end of the week.

Just for fun, here's a way more horrifying shot of the feeding:

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