Wednesday, July 23, 2008

If I Had $1,000,000.00

At work today, I brought up that age old question: if you won a ton of money in the lottery, would you still work? Now, this is a no brainer for me, but I am always amazed by the people who respond like two of my coworkers did today. Some people say "I'd still do some kind of job, because I'd be bored" or something to that effect. This shit baffles me.

If I won the lottery, I would do everything and anything to be sure that I never worked a day in my life again. If that meant living a modest but free life off the interest, then so be it. What I wouldn't have to worry about is being bored. Inky and I would travel. We would see it all, and thanks to a longstanding J4 handshake agreement, we'd have XL to help run our empire.

If we won a huge amount of money, XL would be the CEO of our company: FCE and the president of our charity: The Belinda and Mill Gates Foundation. It should be noted that I have agreed to act in the same capacity for XL, should he ever strike it rich. After getting the basics down, I would set about living a life very much patterned after all the worst attributes of a Roman Emperor. There would be no roads projects, Aqueducts or temples built to please the gods.

No, if I won the BIG powerball I would live a life of controlled opulence. I'm not one for tons of cars, big tasteless houses or gaudy jewelry. I'm all about experiences and to that end I would host an orgy or twelve, have someone feed Inky grapes and fan her and of course stage gladiator style games for my amusement. While traveling around the world, from city to city and country to country Inky and I would try to collect every experience there is till we're called to the big Amphitheatrum Flavium in the sky.

What I wouldn't do, good people, is work.



the Albino Bowler said...

I have truly enjoyed following your blog. You really have a way with words, and I have to admit, your insights actually made me laugh out loud a couple times tonight. Nice pics as well. Now time for some vegemite...

u r not really a show girls fan r u>

XL said...

If I had 1,000,000.00....I'd be rich