Monday, April 17, 2006

Vault: The New Crack.

As I have mentioned once or twice before, I work over night. Third Shift, Graveyard Shift, call it what you will it's very hard on a person. My first experience with over night work came when I was 21, and I spent the summer working in a can factory from 6 pm to 6 am.

We worked four straight days, and then got four days off, which you needed to recover from the 120 degree heat for 12 hours a day. I often went as long as 40 hours without sleep back then, mostly because I was dating my wife and she was 100 miles away, so I had to take every opportunity to see her and sleep came second. I didn't need anything to help me stay awake back then, I was so young that sleep didn't matter to me, and when I had to stay up for work I just did.

That just isn't the case for me these days. I am 43 days from my 30th birthday and I have spent the last year and a half working Midnight to 8:30 AM. There are some nights were my head jerks up and I look around realizing that I have been out cold for a few seconds or a couple of minutes depending on the amount of drool on my chin. If my job didn't pay me so much to do so little there is no way I would have ever stayed this long. These days I still go 30 to 35 hours without sleep, but I can't recover the way I did nine years ago.

Lucky for me there is a soda called Vault. For those of you who haven't heard of this stuff let me clue you in. They took a "Citrus" soda and gave it all the kick of a 4 pack of Red Bull. Not only does this stuff give you wings, it gives you the shakes. One night I made the mistake of drinking a bottle on an empty stomach and I felt like I was going to shake my skin right off my bones. In addition to the 78g of sugar this 20oz packs, Vault's website brags that the soda has 47mg of Caffeine content per each 8oz. That is well over 100mg per bottle!

No wonder I dream about it when I have gone a day or so with out one. My coworkers all agree the stuff is addictive. I heard there are Vault clinics being erected all around the country to help people kick the new habit. First they have you sip a Vault Zero, then they have you chug two Mountain Dews shotgun style. Eventually you step down to Coke and before long you are just sucking on a used coffee filter for your fix.

All I know is that third shifters the world over are saying to the Coke a Cola company: That's Good work out of you for giving us Vault.

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